I offer my semi-professional opinion about the likely reasons behind a guy's odd behaviour.
Is it a rejection? Hmm... Q: Did i get friendzoned? Okay well , so this guy started talking to me and this is what happended guy: so you don’t have to answer this but do you have feels for me? Me: I don't know maybe do you? guy: well I don't know I mean we just started talking and I know you a little bit, from what i know your really really really nice and super chill I just wanna be better friends and talk more so maybe when we get to know each other we could start dating but right now not really. after that he said I had a really adorable personality. so like I don't know what to do loool did he friendzone me because it does make sense about how we just started talking like we started talking for like a week or so , maybe he’s interested idkkk? A: My Response...
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I was typing in my response to a Yahoo Question, I started to realise just how long the answer was going to be... and, just how much more detail I could go into. Therefore, I decided to make a video on the topic. It all boils down to how to be a man, if you are a man. And how to treat women appropriately. It's about masculine and feminine energy, at it's core. Have a watch, and feel free to leave a like or comment, I appreciate it. And, here is a link to the Yahoo Answer question page...
There isn't probably one easy, quick answer to this. There are many possible reasons, or a combination of reasons. But here, I have outlined most of the possible reasons. What do you think - do you agree? Original article: simply click the button below! Q: He ghosted me but suddenly texted last night?
I was talking to this guy for a few weeks then all of a sudden stopped opening my messages. He posted on social media and stuff so I knew he was on his phone. Then 2 weeks after ghosting me he sends a message saying “sorry I didn’t reply sooner” what do I do? A: My Response Hmm... It's impossible to know for sure, no one other than him can truely say. However, I can offer my thoughts if they might be useful for you... 1) Another girl/s was preoccupying his time I think this is probably the biggest reason. He was invested in another girl. She went cold on him and now he's trying to heat up the leftovers with you. Don't take it too personally, men and women both do this fairly often. It's likely he is keeping his options open, and things are quiet lately with the other girls. 2) He isn't massively attracted to you He likes to talk to you because there is fun to be had in flirting. But, he probably doesn't find you super attractive on his 1 - 10 scale. Therefore, he doesn't think of you as a priority in his list of potential dates. This links with the first point too, if he has other girls on his radar who he is rating higher on his attractiveness, he is going to be putting his time and effort into those girls. 3) He has been very busy We all get busy, and we all only have so much time to respond to messages and engage in social media. BUT, it is rude to suddenly go cold like that during a text conversation without some sort of prior warning. And 2 weeks, in my mind, everyone has the time in the space of 2 weeks to give someone a head's up. Maybe he has been on holiday? But if that was the case, I feel you would have been informed. 4) He has a girlfriend and is stringing a series of girls along behind his partner's back Possible. Not likely though as you have seen his social media and would (hopefully) be clued in pretty quickly if he was already in a committed relationship. 5) He got bored of your conversation or felt you weren't interested in him enough Texting back and forth all day can get boring, fast. If you were interested in him you should have made definite plans to see him. 'Definite plans' means agreeing on a time, day and place to meet. You can't get to know someone through a phone or keyboard. You can't date a profile picture. Anyway, I think you should either try to set a definite date as descibed above - if you like him. Or, move onto other options. Two weeks of ghosting is rude and reveals his lower interest in you. Personally, I wouldn't put any more effort into the exchange. Why bother with him when you could be with someone who can't wait to talk to you and see you! I hope I haven't come across as harsh in any way, I've just been honest. For further information, consider visiting my website: https://onlinerelationshiphelp.weebly.com I hope that helps! ;) There isn't one particular reason. It is usually a combination of factors. Regardless, you shouldn't take any form of rejection too personally! Click the link below to be taken to the original article. Q: Why do I keep getting friendzoned from dates I meet on dating apps??!?
I meet guys on dating apps, and before we can even meet in person... they just want to be my friend. These guys are usually hot. And in the most modest way ever, I fall into the category of hot. (Or just assume I do in order to help answer my question).. I’m not sure, are these guys playing games? Playing hard to get? Not interested at all? What’s going on.. why swipe right if ya don’t like me? A: My Response... The previous responder has a point - no one here is really going to know. Everyone is different, and so the guys you're talking about may all have different reasons for going cold on you. But, I will offer some of my thoughts in case it might be helpful for you. 1) Another girl crops up in his life. If they get back in touch with you after a couple weeks, or so, of 'no contact'. It may be that they were meeting someone else, but then that/they fell through so they've checked back in with you. You won't know for sure, but just be mindful. Or maybe he already has a girlfriend and doing the online dating thing gives him an ego boost. 2) They are very shy/lazy. A lot of people go along with something: 'Yeah, yeah, sounds good.' But they either know there and then that they can't be bothered to do what they said they would do, or to go where they said they would. Most the time, becasue they are lazy but too weak to possible upset your feelings by saying, sorry no. But, they may also be nervous about actually meeting you. Possible. 3) They are probably NOT playing games Guys don't tend to play games like this. They either want to meet up with you, or they don't. If they like you and want to see you, they probably wouldn't risk screwing things up by 'playing games'. 4) They are not physically attracted to you enough. Possible, but they wouldn't put much time into messaging back and forth in the first place if they weren't physically interested. Guys tend to swipe right to everyone, don't assume anything until you meet them in person. 5) Your conversation online didn't 'click' If the two of you have a lack-luster online discourse, they can probably tell that the two of you wouldn't have a very fun date. I assume you weed out the guys who are just looking for sex. So, you're probably left with the guys who are somewhat experienced with dating. Therefore, they are more likely to tell how things would go if you were to meet. I would recommend you let guys ask you out. If they do, they are more likely to go through with it. Also, speak to them over the phone first. Hopefully, they take the lead as a gentleman and ask for your number to speak with you over the phone - but if they don't, ask for their number and agree on a time and day to speak to each other over the phone. That way, you will see for yourself if they would make for a fun date. I hope that helps! Good luck! ;) (And, focus on meeting people in real life more - a much better way to go about dating IMO) He is more than likey interested, as most men are friendly with girls they think are attractive; the friendlier they are - the higher the chance is they fancy you! Click the link below for the original post, and my response! Q: Is he just a nice guy?
He is a guy in my school ( a year ahead of me) and we met previously at a party and we chatted for a bit. Now whenever he sees me at school he always says hi and he tried to talk to me once about school. Yesterday, I was at the library reading and when I looked up I noticed he was looking at me, so he waved and smiled. Is he trying to be friend or is he interested? A: My Response He is probably too shy to be direct with you. Chances are, he does like you enough to go out with you, judging by your description. It may be a good idea, next time you see him and while making conversation, to ask what he's doing on the weekend. See from his response two things.... 1) If he is interested in you, his response will sound something along the lines of... 'oh, not much really' or 'just chilling, you?' If he does, then that is a good indication that you should suggest meeting up (either for a coffee, or lunch) and then you will know if he is interested because he will take you up on the offer. Hopefully, he asks for your number or gives you his. If his response to the suggestion, you feel, is a little lukewarm, then the chances are he will say yes (to avoid hurting your feelings face to face) but will either text you to cancel any plans you made or just not meet you. But then, at least you know and you can walk away and not give him the time of day ever again. 2) You can better judge if he is a good guy for you. You probably want a confident, self-assured (but not arrogant) man with integrity. If he likes you but is hiding behind a 'nice guy' persona, chances are he isn't the type of guy who would really 'light your bulb'. Don't put him on a pedestal - YOU'RE the catch. Let's see if he is worth you spending your time with him (is the mentality you should have). Sounds like you are both only young though, but you want to start learning about weeding out the less than desirable men now (or maybe you already are noticing patterns). Recognise the signs of men, who will later down the line in the relationship, become desperate, overly-attached, too sensitive or possibly even hostile. These type of men repulse 95%ish of women, so chances are high that you would also feel repulsed. ...I hope that helps; gives you some confidence about how to go about the situation. Just remember, you're still learning. Take whatever comes of the situation as an opportunity for growth - you literally cannot lose! Good luck. Yes. Yes, you should. Here, in this Yahoo Q&A, I provide some advice to a young lady who has a bit of a problem with her past actions, now that she has a new partner... Q: Told him i was rich and made up a fairy tale life? I met this guy i really liked in high school. We started communicating over the phone. We have been talking for like 9 months. I have low self esteem and i dint feel good enough for him so i made up a lie and told him i recently inherited millions of dollars and live this great life. He claims to really care about me but he ask for money somtimes indirectly. Now i don't know if he wants to date me only because he thinks i have millions. How do i tell him that i have been lying to him for almost a year about being rich smh it was so childish of me we are adults. I just didnt feel good enough for him so i made myself into this character of a woman i think he wants. A: My response... I'm not sure if he is only there for you for the money, it would be unwise to send him any money or anything by the way, but by the sounds of things - you need to focus on yourself and move on from him. If you've both been friends for 9 months and talking over the phone, you have to ask why nothing more ever progressed in your relationship. I doubt he ever asked you out? If that's the case, then either... 1) He wasn't really interested in having a relationship with you, unfortunately, but hey - that's ok. Not everyone likes everyone else, don't take that personally. If this is true, then it is highly likely he is after 'the money' now, especially as you have had to ask the question (which suggests he's given you clues that this is about the money after all). 2) He was too timid/shy, and therefore probably is not a great catch (at least at the moment, he's only young). So you shouldn't be worried on not having the chance to date him. You want a confident guy who isn't going to settle to being just friends for 9 months. Him only talking to you as a friend for 9 months reveals a lot about him. If this is true, then you don't want to date him because he's probably not a good catch, but you are both still young, so I can totally understand if this doesn't really concern you. Just, maybe be ready to come to the realisation that actually you don't want to be with him long-term. 3) He's had a partner all this time so he couldn't date you. I don't think this was the case as you've not said this, but if this was true, then I can see why you were just friends for 9 months. If this was true, then it may be that now because he's single, he wants to ask you out - this is ok. But really, you should have tried to move on/find other options while he was committed so you didn't get hung up on one person (which is never a good idea). In any case, you have to tell him the truth and see how he responds. You have to be honest because if you continue the lie, when he finds out in the future (if you two continue to date), it will be ten times worse. Also, it will just play on your mind - make you miserable. Also, he will soon vanish if it is about the money - and bingo, you know the truth. Or he may leave due to the fact you have been lying to him. But anyway, tell him the truth, see how he reacts, it will probably reveal his intentions in regards to whether he's only dating you for the money or not. Then, you can either date him, with peace of mind, or things end between you. If things do end, don't stress it too much, learn from the experience. You will find someone better in due course, but you will need to take the time to work on yourself, explore your hobbies, etc. If you felt you weren't good enough for him, you have to ask, why? What do you need to do so that you can be good enough for someone you really like? Focus on that. Improve yourself, that's the biggest investment you can make. Then, when you meet someone else, you won't feel that way again and won't have the need to lie. In my experience, a person you're meant to be with - things move easy and effortlessly, there's no need to lie or manipulate. This doesn't come overnight though, and there are thousands more people out there who you try to connect with but don't - for whatever reason. So, don't be too hard on yourself, whatever happens from this, it can only work to serve you in future. I hope that helps! I didn't expect this response to be so long, sorry! Hello, Welcome to the site! If you haven't read the 'Home' page yet, let me introduce myself. My name is Adrian, and I have whipped up this little website as means of a central hub for my online 'brand', so to speak! My goal is to provide anyone and everyone with valuable and insightful knowledge and advice in regards to life and relationship problems, quiries and general questions. Primarily, I aim to do this through answering people's questions, either through direct e-mail communications, or by responding to people's questions on online platforms such as Yahoo Answers or Quora. Today is Monday 19th August, 2019. By the end of this week I hope to have completed enough of the website to hit that 'publish' button! I want all the pages to have worthwhile material, ready to view, straight out of the gate. And, I want to have just a couple more YouTube videos uploaded... Oh, I hope you've had a look at the 'Social' tab by now, on that page you will find the links to my Twitter feed and YouTube account. Check it out, there's plenty of videos up and I'm always making more! It's completely free, what have you got to lose? All the best! -Ade |
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Yours truly, Coach Adey. Happy to help! Archives
October 2019
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